compassion for the undeserving

Today I got to experience some of what I imagine Jesus went through on the cross. Not the physical pain, but the mental struggle. Jesus is hanging there to help sinful humanity out and we are standing at his feet spitting on him and insulting him. Jesus is the son of God, legions of angels at his command. He created and sustains the very people cursing at him. He would not even have to flinch and they could all drop dead of heart attacks. He could have so easily put those mockers in their places. Did he want to? I would have...or would I? Today I got to find out. I responded to a fight at one of our high schools. I don't even know the details, but the instigator is there with three friends, being questioned and searched. One officer takes instigator aside and tries to get him to see how stupid what he almost just did was. Instigator refuses to admit doing much wrong and feins respect for the officer. The officer lets him go and as soon as he gets back out to the car with his friends he starts talking trash. They all start talking about crooked cops which we are not and have not been to them. They are issued ban and bar letters banning them from the school campus and they loudly cackle and joke about putting them in their glove box with their other ban and bar letters. They brag about stupid cops not catching them drinking alcohol underage. They are rude and disrespectful and are doing everything they can to offend us or pick a fight with us. Everything in me wants to take them up on the offer, to unleash on them the punishment past generations would have gladly given them. Punishment that would have "helped" them respect us. But that isn't what we do. I must not listen to that voice. I must find it in me to rise above and not get sucked in, and I did. All we were trying to do was help these people out. There was no appreciation, only scorn. There is nothing you can say to these kids they "know" everything. They must maintain an air of power and control. They have a smart ass answer for everything. I am not even a person to them. I am an opportunity to prove how "tough" they are, how "in control" they are. I didn't throw my pearls of wisdom before these "swine." I kept my mouth shut. It took everything in me and it has burned in me all evening. The next step...what I need to do next time I guess is to look on them as they mock me with compassion as Jesus did. Not quite there yet...